meditation

Things don’t fall apart they fall away. This is what I keep hearing in my head. As I struggle to hold onto things that I know no longer fit the picture of me--the newly birthed and shiny picture of me, the one that feels vulnerable and naked and not quite able to cope on it’s own yet--the feeling is not so good and I yearn to hide under a rock until it all goes away.

I am currently at a writer's conference trying to schlock my kid stories to the powers that be. There are so many people here trying to do the same, standing in my way. I thought it would be fun to get to know these way-standers, but then I discovered that their stories are better than mine, they know more than I do, and are generally three miles up the road of a writer's life from me. Now that I possess these humbling, deflating nuggets of information, I have two more meetings to conduct whereby I try to wow and dazzle the frazzled, over-pitched agents. Hrrrumph.

Pity me. Pray for me.

I am currently at a writer’s conference trying to schlock my kid stories to the powers that be. There are so many people here trying to do the same, standing in my way. I thought it would be fun to get to know these way-standers, but then I discovered that their stories are better than mine, they know more than I do, and are generally three miles up the road of a writer’s life from me. Now that I possess these humbling, deflating nuggets of information, I have two more meetings to conduct whereby I try to wow and dazzle the frazzled, over-pitched agents. Hrrrumph.

Pity me. Pray for me.

Ever heard the expression, “You get what you need, not what you want?” Oh how we hate to hear this one, right? It means we don’t always get the relationship that is nothing but slow dancing to Journey songs and long nights of soul gazing. It means we don’t win the lottery, or win the part of George Clooney’s love interest. We don’t get Giselle’s thighs, Angelina’s lips, or Jessica’s boobs.

We get what we need. We get the body that is sometimes hard to accept, the relationship that challenges our sense of self or our ability to practice loving-kindness. We get the job that feels unfulfilling, or uncreative, or downright stifling. We get the bank account that teaches us, in whatever form we so clearly need.

1.) I now anchor my being-ness in the present moment- I release the pains of the past, the fears of the future and know that in this perfect moment, all my needs are met.

2.) I now seek to know and behold the center of my being. I recognize that it is always there, I need only direct my attention toward it.

3.) I now choose to practice loving-kindness with my self and my world.

4.) I now practice non-attachment, recognizing my emotions as powerful teachers that I can choose to learn from lovingly.

5.) I now commit myself to knowing the absolute truth of who I am.

6.) I now cultivate awareness in every moment of life. I allow the light of awareness to illuminate my every thought, word, and deed.

Happy New YOU.

A New Year's Blessing.

Dear One! Welcome to the New Year and the New You. I recognize the perfection of this year, already complete, lacking nothing, full and ripe with opportunities for the expression of health, abundance, love, peace, and joy. I see and know that this New Year is holding the most loving space for the birth of a new you! It enthusiastically is here to witness and support your coming forth with your new choices, and new desires.

I bless this New Year in it's entirety, each moment of this New Year, now present, now here for us to be grateful for. It is such a blessing indeed, to have something like our human time, here present as a marker, a symbolic womb of gestation where we get to grow and are nurtured into a knowingness of who we are.

You are the gift my friends. You are the present, waiting under the tree all bright and shiny with a big bow on top. Your gift is perfect, and so beautifully and uniquely yours to give.

We have all been gazing at your gift, guessing at what's inside. Some gaze in admiration for the packaging is truly a site to behold. Some gaze with curiosity; what could possible be in a package so tiny? Still others gaze in judgement; that doesn't look like a present at all. Pay no mind to any of them, for the truth of your perfect gift is eternal and unchanging. It is whole and complete, lacking nothing.

As we enter into this holiday month, let us all take a deep cleansing breath, draw a protective sphere of light around us and brace ourselves for the one thing we are never prepared for: family drama.

We all got it. We all have many a story to tell. Or not. Perhaps you are one of the lucky 17 people who have escaped the family cocoon drama free. If so, would you be so bold as to grace us with your alien energy?

My husband is a natural born animal rescuer. It’s not enough for him to rescue dirty, emaciated dogs trying to cross busy streets, he also likes to rescue crickets, spiders, snails, bees, ants and grasshoppers.

He has developed a whole special system for crickets as they tend to have a disproportionate death wish. Crickets are always flinging themselves into our garbage disposal, or into a tub full of water, which Glen then feverishly works to rescue them from. Hubby takes a scratchy sponge (he has figured out that they like this), and once the cricket barely steps onto the sponge, he flings it out the back door, onto the grass. I am in awe of his respect for life, but secretly wonder if the baseball-like flinging kills them anyway.

Friends... I did some stream of consciousness writing last night and this is what came out. So turn on some jazz music, don your raspberry beret, and get to snappin'.

Don't u know who u are u sexy superstar- gorgeous lovely light so bubbly bright and shining, shine on for me and then that's u, u see because u r me, u r me, u r me, u r me, u r me, u see?

Singer lover sister brother friend or mother all things to all beings- labels everywhere for human boxes. it's okay to transcend your yoga mat, it's okay to play out of bounds, it's okay to be boundless.

Pretty pretty gift open wide so we can see inside. the greatest gift u have for us is the greatest gift for u. Feel it. feels good.